As a relationship coach, I often get asked, “What exactly is a relationship coach?”
Today’s article will focus on just that! We’ll talk about:
- • What types of relationship coaching there are
- • What a relationship coach does
- • What kinds of issues a relationship coach can help solve, and
- • Whether this kind of coach might be right for you
Let’s dive in!
Types of Relationship Coaching
A relationship coach helps singles and/or couples succeed in their personal and/or professional relationships.
Thus, there are several types of relationship coaching, such as:
- • Dating / singles coaching
- • Couples coaching
- • Marriage Coaching
- • Family Coaching
- • Relationship coping coaching
- • Divorce recovery coaching
- • Business relationship coaching
Coaches may specialize in one or more types of relationship coaching.
For example, I specialize in coaching both singles who are dating and people who are in relationships.
That said, relationship coaches are often exposed to multiple types of coaching during their training.
Additionally, relationship coaching can be combined with other forms of coaching, such as life coaching. For example, I became a life coach before becoming a relationship coach.
What Does a Relationship Coach Do?
First, a relationship coach uses a variety of techniques to help clients gain greater awareness as to what their life and relationship goals are.
He or she asks insightful questions at the right time, helping clients to discover for themselves what actions will best help them achieve their life and relationship goals.
This means that a coach does not tell others what to do.
This kind of coaching recognizes that the answers to life and relationship fulfillment lie within the clients themselves.
In other words, only you truly know what’s best for you.
And because life comes filled with twists, turns, surprises, challenges, and different kinds of opportunities, sometimes it can be tough to even know what we want!
Moreover, our relationship wants, needs, and goals may change over time.
This is where a coach comes in. He or she will help you “clear the smoke,” so to speak, so that you can visualize more clearly where you’d like to go in your love life.
Second, a relationship coach focuses on your present and future. (This is unlike a therapist, who would focus on your past and also address any mental health issues.)
He or she helps you to decide which goals will get you closer to your relationship vision, which potential obstacles you should prepare for, and how to overcome those obstacles as they come up.
Finally, a coach is one of your biggest cheerleaders!
A good coach will support you through the highs and lows of your journey, celebrate your wins, and simply be that listening ear that all of us sometimes need.
What Kinds of Issues Can a Relationship Coach Help Solve?
The kinds of issues that a relationship coach can help solve will depend on that coach’s specialty.
For now, we’ll use dating / singles coaching and relationship coaching as examples, as those are my specialties.
Here are some examples of things that these kinds of coaching can help with:
Dating / Singles Coaching
- • Handling rejection from ghosting, “situationships” that didn’t turn into relationships, and other dating disappointments
- • Learning how to “let go” of the outcome, and focus more on connecting with others in an authentic, fulfilling way
- • Bringing the fun back into dating, without experiencing “dating burnout”
- • Learning how to break certain patterns that have caused prior relationships to end
- • Building the self-confidence needed to meet new people, date confidently, set boundaries, and embrace who you are at your core
- • Identifying what is at the root of any disagreements with your partner, and addressing those root causes
- • Learning how to create a safe, supportive environment to communicate in a healthy way with one another, where you can even talk about “the tougher” things
- • Gaining more insight into each partner’s relationship wants, needs, and values, and how best to help each other feel heard, loved, and understood
- • Increasing intimacy in a relationship
- • Expressing and “managing” emotions while in a relationship
The options are truly endless! Every individual, and every relationship, is entirely unique.
A coach will go on a journey with you to best understand who you are as a person and what your current and/or ideal relationship looks like.
From there, the goal is to help you see success — as you define it — in your dating life or relationship, so you can lead a joyful, fulfilling life.
Is Relationship Coaching Right for Me?
Signs It May Be Right for You
Here are some signs dating / relationship coaching may be right for you:
- • You want to learn more about who you are on a deeper level, and why you think the way you do when it comes to dating and/or relationships
- • You want someone to truly listen and understand you
- • You want to understand why things aren’t working out in your dating life or relationships, or — if things are going well — how you can continue to best nurture your relationships and grow
- • You want more clarity on what your life and relationship goals are
- • You want someone to help in terms of handling dating disappointments, a breakup, or some other kind of loss
- • You want to build your self-confidence and reduce anxiety in dating and relationships
Again, the options here are endless! There are a wide variety of topics that this kind of coach can help with. The benefit of such a coach is their ability to cater to your unique situation.
Another thing to consider when deciding whether a dating / relationship coach is right for you is cost.
The cost for dating coach services, for example, can range from $100 an hour for coaching services to over $10,000 for group coaching and other long-term programs.
That said, depending on the options a coach offers, you may be able to simply commit to one session and see how it works for you.
And as relationship coaching has proven to be quite successful for many, finding (and keeping) love is well worth the investment.
When determining if dating / relationship coaching is right for you, it’s helpful to understand the different formats that these kinds of coaching can take.
For example, 1:1 relationship coaching can occur over the phone, over video using services like Zoom or Skype, over email, or even through things like Instant Messenger.
If a certain format is important to you, be sure to ask potential coaches what format they use.
If the idea of 1:1 dating / relationship coaching doesn’t feel right for you just yet, a self-study online course could be a great alternative.
There are many courses out there to help others achieve various dating and relationship goals.
My Intentional Romantic Relationships online course, for example, provides you with a step-by-step system that teaches you how to date with intention, attract the best match for you, and build a relationship that lasts.
It works well for both singles who are dating and people who are in a relationship.
Because it is self-paced, provides lifetime access, and includes instructional videos and other resources, many find this to be a good alternative to ongoing calls with a dating or relationship coach.
The Right Relationship Coach Is “Worth It”
I may be biased, but I truly believe finding the right relationship coach is worth it!
If nothing else, it makes a world of difference to know you have someone in your corner, cheering you on. Especially during the more challenging moments that dating or relationships can bring.
Simply by having that support system, you’ll gain the comfort and courage you need to take action in your love life, and make those changes that will help you reach your relationship goals.
That said, the right relationship coach will provide far more than a listening ear!
He or she will also help you clarify your individual and relationship goals, come up with an action plan, and handle whatever comes your way in healthy, effective ways.
The end result? Finding and keeping a love that fills you with joy. And to me, there’s nothing more worth it.